Monstermaster13 reviews: Ripper
Monstermaster13 reviews: Ripper
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Nathan:
Hello, i'm Monstermaster13 and welcome back to the Walken-A-Thon. As you know I have been turned into Chris...so this is going to be a little bit more interesting.
I'm not reviewing a movie this time but rather a video game. Do you remember FMVs like Goosebumps: Escape from Horrorland and Demolition Man for the 3DO? If you do then you are in for a treat.
I am going to be reviewing an FMV game that had the honor of gracing the computer world back in the 90's.
This video game has been riffed on by Spoony but I think it's time I reviewed it. What is the name of the game you ask?
Why it's none other than Ripper. The basic plot of the game is that it is a futuristic retelling of Jack the Ripper.
You play as a character by the name of Jake Quinlan, he is an investigative reporter who writes about the Ripper's attacks. And in the game it is your job to find out who did it.
There are lots of puzzles and challenges that you have to go through in order to get to the bottom of the mystery.
The characters in the game are played by a great all-star cast, the main character is played by Scott Cohen, but the others are played by John Rhys Davis (Gimli, for your LOTR fans out there), Karen Black, Paul Giamatti, Jimmie Walker, Burgess Meredith (known as Mickie in the Rocky movie series) and of course...the main reason why this game is so well known - Chris Walken.
Walken plays Detective Vince Magnotta who is well...a detective, but with like most Walken roles - he has a bit of a suspicious and bloodthirsty streak. He's supposed to be on your side but he's one of the people suspected of being the 'Ripper'.
And he has the funniest performance ever in this game, even more so than as J-Man in Envy. Listen for yourself.
"Vince Magnotta:
This guy is...unfucking believable!"
*laughs* I just love how he says his lines in this game...it sounds like he's practicing his Hessian growls when he talks. And also....it really does sound like he is describing himself and I agree..
I mean look at his mannerisms whispers in the middle of his sentences, reads off cue-cards, has long pauses, emphasizes on words that shouldn't be emphasized, and look at him...he can't even stand still..
....Seriously...who talks like that? What are you looking at me for? I remember my lines....I don't....*looks at cue-card* read off cue cards. These accusations about me whispering in the middle of my sentences are completely wrong too...i've never done that....I may be Chris but I don't talk entirely like he does....*whispers* it's not like i've developed his speech pattern or anything.
And what's this bullhockey about me having odd, long pauses? I don't think i've ever done that before.....and *pause*.....I never will. Oh crap! Stupid Walken mannerisms.
Oh well...I can't fight my Walken-like nature...it just wouldn't be right. Anyway..now where was I? Oh yeah..the review.
Ripper is a fantastic game and is definitely worth a go at getting. If you find it on Amazon or Ebay - I suggest ordering it.
Not to mention that Don't Fear the Reaper is the theme song of this game...which is a very rockin song if I do say so myself. Please...it sounds really familiar but I don't know why.
(Jon:
That's because...cowbell. Tink tink tink! *he plays the cowbell*)
Cowbell? Oh my god...I gotta have more of it. More cowbell, more cowbell, I want to hear more of it...more cowbell, more cowbell! I have a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell!
*Regains compulsure* Sorry about that. It's a Walken instinct...everytime I hear that song I have the urge to say that.
I give this game 10 out of 10 and two monstrous clawed thumbs up, and a high reccomendation.
I'm Monstermaster13 and this has been another Walken-A-Thon review, now if you excuse me i'm going to find some way to control my Walken instincts so they don't act up again.
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Nathan:
Hello, i'm Monstermaster13 and welcome back to the Walken-A-Thon. As you know I have been turned into Chris...so this is going to be a little bit more interesting.
I'm not reviewing a movie this time but rather a video game. Do you remember FMVs like Goosebumps: Escape from Horrorland and Demolition Man for the 3DO? If you do then you are in for a treat.
I am going to be reviewing an FMV game that had the honor of gracing the computer world back in the 90's.
This video game has been riffed on by Spoony but I think it's time I reviewed it. What is the name of the game you ask?
Why it's none other than Ripper. The basic plot of the game is that it is a futuristic retelling of Jack the Ripper.
You play as a character by the name of Jake Quinlan, he is an investigative reporter who writes about the Ripper's attacks. And in the game it is your job to find out who did it.
There are lots of puzzles and challenges that you have to go through in order to get to the bottom of the mystery.
The characters in the game are played by a great all-star cast, the main character is played by Scott Cohen, but the others are played by John Rhys Davis (Gimli, for your LOTR fans out there), Karen Black, Paul Giamatti, Jimmie Walker, Burgess Meredith (known as Mickie in the Rocky movie series) and of course...the main reason why this game is so well known - Chris Walken.
Walken plays Detective Vince Magnotta who is well...a detective, but with like most Walken roles - he has a bit of a suspicious and bloodthirsty streak. He's supposed to be on your side but he's one of the people suspected of being the 'Ripper'.
And he has the funniest performance ever in this game, even more so than as J-Man in Envy. Listen for yourself.
"Vince Magnotta:
This guy is...unfucking believable!"
*laughs* I just love how he says his lines in this game...it sounds like he's practicing his Hessian growls when he talks. And also....it really does sound like he is describing himself and I agree..
I mean look at his mannerisms whispers in the middle of his sentences, reads off cue-cards, has long pauses, emphasizes on words that shouldn't be emphasized, and look at him...he can't even stand still..
....Seriously...who talks like that? What are you looking at me for? I remember my lines....I don't....*looks at cue-card* read off cue cards. These accusations about me whispering in the middle of my sentences are completely wrong too...i've never done that....I may be Chris but I don't talk entirely like he does....*whispers* it's not like i've developed his speech pattern or anything.
And what's this bullhockey about me having odd, long pauses? I don't think i've ever done that before.....and *pause*.....I never will. Oh crap! Stupid Walken mannerisms.
Oh well...I can't fight my Walken-like nature...it just wouldn't be right. Anyway..now where was I? Oh yeah..the review.
Ripper is a fantastic game and is definitely worth a go at getting. If you find it on Amazon or Ebay - I suggest ordering it.
Not to mention that Don't Fear the Reaper is the theme song of this game...which is a very rockin song if I do say so myself. Please...it sounds really familiar but I don't know why.
(Jon:
That's because...cowbell. Tink tink tink! *he plays the cowbell*)
Cowbell? Oh my god...I gotta have more of it. More cowbell, more cowbell, I want to hear more of it...more cowbell, more cowbell! I have a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell!
*Regains compulsure* Sorry about that. It's a Walken instinct...everytime I hear that song I have the urge to say that.
I give this game 10 out of 10 and two monstrous clawed thumbs up, and a high reccomendation.
I'm Monstermaster13 and this has been another Walken-A-Thon review, now if you excuse me i'm going to find some way to control my Walken instincts so they don't act up again.
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